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Leaving.

July 30, 2009
new

“How many times have I told myself that I’m going to quit you only to find out that I’m two steps back?” -mia

Is there such this as a good… bye?
Is there?
I was transferred to a new room that is not so new to me.
Trying to fit in a crowd not so new to me.
Sitting with my bosses.
Melting.
Crushing on the guy, loving the girl.
This is another new exciting sad thing about working. From the E-learning room of Vibal, I was transferred to the I don’t know what room is this? PRD? Corp Comm? Or to be simple… the room “in or near Sales.”
I LOVE E-LEARNING
If there was a group of people that truly welcomed me here in Vibal it was them. Sir Alfred was the first person I ate lunch with here and made me so comfortable. Mar, Sol, and King, the knights of E-learning failed to give me company at first—for I was too shy to bond with boys. But when Sally—my bestest friend ever in Vibal—came, E-learning votled in 1 solid, sticky-gummy, rugbied team. Then came Kuya dong and dongkey. It was perfect… but I have to leave and go to the department I belong.
I love PRD/Corp Comm. My boss is the easiest to approach boss in Vibal, on top of that she listens and understands. My other boss, the “he”, is a major reason for a major KO. He’s totally a hands down—brain, body and beautiful (married with kids). Dunno, liked him the 1st time, I met him. He is a “no-batman” but fun joker. My partner is the Mr. Friendship of Vibal. I believe no one can ever do the things he does; he greets everyone around, smiles and charms everyone. And I never had a low toned moment with him.
E-learning is home to me and my heart rested there for awhile and changes seems so hard to swim now. I know I belong in PR and this is where life, lungs, love is. It takes time…. Takes time to fall and drown in love. But I heart both.
LEAVING.
My partner, JR is leaving as well. And soon, I know I will too. JR’s life is planned before he entered Vibal. I started planning my life here and realized a lot of things. Lucky him… he is in two places at once: the place where he should be and the place where his heart beats. :)
love, now and always,

Not at the right place at the right time

July 22, 2009
"Sun moon collides, slides, dies." -mia
I'm, again, not in the right place and time when this happened. I'm not after the photos I can take during the eclipse, what I'm after is the memoirs... when will this memoir for me come?

from http://azraelsmerryland.blogspot.com/2009/07/partial-solar-eclipse-july-22-2009.html

Special thanks to Azrael!


love, now and always,

just like a PILL

July 21, 2009

Jolting as I type, not of fear but love.
“Sometimes love is like taking a medicine. You grab a pill to make you better…”
This pill’s a paracetamol, orange, round.
Lying at my bed, vanishing the end that left. The same. I cry, tried to figure, shape, mold but it’s formless, shapeless, hopeless.
Move from side to side, wipe a tear from eye to eye. Painful.
Needs a paracetamol. A pill, someone… to get over this.
Went downstairs with aches of heart and head merged. Closer to the cabinet, chose what drug to take, the one that will, the one would ill, the other would kill.
Reached for the chosen bottle. A new battle. Drank a paracetamol, a pain reliever, a fever reducer. A rebound. Like a guy for the meantime mending heartaches, headaches of past fakes.
Opened the bottle. Gave one a chance.
Lifted a capsule, pulled, reached your waiting hand.
Held it. Swallowed it. Tastes… tasteless.
Pretended afterwards. Forced a smile. I’m better.
Makes me sick. Makes me ill. Hidden the pain.
I know this pill won’t make me better instantly. But if I keep drinking it every single day, with its right dosage and doses, I will be addicted. Maybe this pill would replace the effects of the past pill. Maybe he can erase you in my system. If I open up for a chance, yes this pill would make me better. One day, some day, he could cure up your medical malpractices… in me.
love, now and always,

Shuffle

July 15, 2009



Play. Next. Next. Shuffle. Shuffle. Shuffle.
It played the same song in 3 consecutive shuffles… is it meant to be?

My Mongol pen rolled to the side of my desk.
Tried to save its lead. It fell. It’s dead.

Should it be destiny that drawn its line why I am sitting in front of this computer, writing things you cannot understand? Or is it the tragedy that life made, to be here.

Loss. Write a poem about loss and burn the whole thing. You cannot read loss, you cannot write. You can feel.

Drink a glass of whisky. Turn red, tipsy. Open up. Confess. I love you in my most bangag way.

Cross the street. Don’t look on both sides go. If true love comes in the most unexpected way, could it be the man bumping me.

Hold my hand. I’ll hold your hand. What’s the difference? Both holds… but one lets go. I’ll hold. I won’t let go.

Take a ply. Wipe the tears away, we are happy.

Heard this song in the radio, dedicated it to you... TITLE: Beer by Itchyworms

Drove my car, imagined you by the passenger seat, singing songs with me. Miss you like crazy. Drive me crazy!!!

love, now and always,

Deflation

July 10, 2009

One full, blown away,
Flew away
One blossom of sadness
Took its place
One word destroyed
Deployed dethroned sanity
One sword has the
Sharpest key











One mind sharp
with edgy blades
One heart. Harped
Hatred.




love, now and always,
Photobucket








Never been this GAY.

July 10, 2009



“And Mia lived happily ever after.”


That’s it? No mad Mom restricting her daughter about late dates and PDA? No Dad worried about daughter’s whereabouts?



No courtship stories of weird fun challenge—eat tuyo, eat monggo seed, “shout to world you love me!” Be here exactly 3am. Bring me mangoes from Guimaras. Let's ride this jeep. Let's walk ten thousand miles. Let's stay up till the next midnight.


If it's an instant yes, there will be no LQ stories of I’m sorry, I’m never gonna do it again, I’ll never break your heart? Give me one more chance baby? Look… you and me are meant to be!, One last chance with you? Look into my eyes and tell me you don't love me...



No sweet baby love talks of....? “I miss you baby!” “Be my pie… Cutie pie!” “Why do you love me?” “You complete me” “Hug Me” “I need you” "God has destined me to be with you"



I, personally, would want to watch love grow. There will be heartaches, there will be pain, but in the end, you'll still savour love at its best. I would rather experience love in its CRUEL-est form... Than be in love.



"Than I'm in love... the end"



I would want someone chasing me head over heels. I would want to drop you first like a hot potato then, go crawling back to you, begging I realized I love you. I would want some action, mom and dad shouting mad at their stupid lil daughter. I would wish your Mom to curse me, I would like her to disagree, just for the sake of story.



I would want our love story to be GAY. to be happy... together with its up, down, under. I wouldn't want it easy. Make-break-make is challenging. I love you then I hate you then I love you should be a habbit.



In this way, love is never tiring. Exciting. Something to look forward to. Some so constant, yet so unconstant to us.... it's ours.



love, now and always,



Shadow

July 10, 2009

You really don’t know what love is until you get to a point where you’re ready to trade ten years of your life for a single kiss, all your wealth for a single touch, or when you’re willing to leave someone you’ve been with the last decade for a total stranger. Love isn’t about the time you spent with someone, or the challenges you’ve gone thru together... It’s about that rush of butterflies in your stomach or that single heartbeat that says..."I’d rather have a day with this person than spend an eternity with someone else..".
---------------------
Freeze. No one moves, unless I said so. But no one stopped. The world moves, changes from time to time—ignoring me, ignoring you.


It goes around like a carousel, turning, circling, not knowing who rides. It goes around like time, twitching past hour, rush hour, last hour. It forgets me, it forgets you. Only remembers if you do something dangerous. Only remembers you doing extraordinary. Always forgets what values you. Always leaves.



Sometimes, it feels like you don’t belong, alone. And when you feel like no one’s there, maybe a shadow here waits. Like Me. Maybe a shadow here needs. Like Me.


Step inside, touch, twist. Be carried.



I wish I was your shadow.



love, now and always,

Photobucket

Of life and Pain

July 08, 2009
Stucked in the computer monitor for awhile.
Tap, tap, tap, type… stop.
Backspace, save, escape.
Type again.
Alt f4… save.
Cancel.
No, I shouldn’t give up.

I should blog, type the thoughts in my mind now or it will be gone forever.

Today is a beautiful day. I realized how unlucky I am to live in this world. How I need air to live. How I need water, food, clothing, shelter to survive.

How I need friends to laugh with, be with. How I have to talk to mom about life-love-life problems. How I need my brother’s alarm clock every morning. How I… need this, need that, want this, want that….
There are lots of things I need to be able to live. How unlucky I am to need that. But at the same time lucky…. Because I’m still alive.

Weird?

I wanted to die yesterday and now realized that I love to live, hundreds, thousands of century…That every single breathe I take, every beat of my heart, every blink of my eye, every pulse, signs me that I’m still living. That these heartaches wounds deep now, but will later heal its own. That scars of pain doesn’t matter now, for surgeries are left, right, down, under.

Maybe I’m living too much that I couldn’t feel it anymore. Living’s been perfect in the days that gone. No problem, no challenge… just alive. Maybe God would want another twist, he’s bored and saturated with my perfect life.

Now, he’s back to attack for more fighting. He’s back for some action. Anyway, a hero wouldn’t be a hero without some villain. But he wouldn’t send terrorist in front of me like he how he bombed off WTC. He wouldn’t trap me in a broken elevator. He wouldn’t break my shoes, steal my phone. He wouldn’t send a fire-mad boss. He wouldn’t touch, push, hurt a family and a friend…

He would break a heart, my heart… to mend, make it stronger—to feel pain is to live—to be alive.
love, now and always,
Photobucket

Overcome…

July 07, 2009
How many times have I tried killing myself?

I’m way too sure that I tried killing myself 5 times…

The 1st attempt was when I was 5 yrs old. I mixed vetsin with ice tea and drank it all. Vetsin was rumored to kill people? Dunno if it’s true but that’s how I see it before. The 1st attempt wasn’t successful. The ice tea and vetsin had a weird taste; not good, not bad and not enough to kill me. After drinking a liter, I felt dizzy… I fainted.

I woke up in the sofa with my Lola waiting for me back to life, worried. I thought it was heaven or hell when I’ll open my eyes again but no I was in our house. Didn’t even bring me to the hospital... who would want a gossip of a mentally-ill 5 yrs old? No one.

The 2nd attempt was when I was still in SPC. I used the blind cord to kill me. Standed on a higher place, wrap it on my neck, jumped… the first 10 secs is perfect… I wasn’t breathing for awhile, closed my eyes, still not breathing, it’s working…I’m dying! Then suddenly, a heated pain in the neck started bleeding. Ouch. When you feel pain, you’re still alive. OMG. I’m alive… The neck scar is still visible to this date—the sign of pain, the sign of life.

The 3rd, 4th and 5th are all the same, used the traditional way of slicing my pulse. But none of it succeeded. None of it even went to hospital authorities. None and kept inside the family, forgotten over the years. Forgotten.

The lines are not that visible anymore. The lines formed its lies—not telling the whole world—I don’t want to live.

Who would want to live in a cruel world like this? I outlived MJ, outlived Elvis, outlived Diana, outlive M.Theresa. Will die after this great people. Who am I to lose? I’m not of bigger value.

Million times thought of killing myself in a car accident. Will I die? If I bump my car somewhere dangerous would God grant another life, another breathe? Would God still want me to live? What if I really want to die? I want to.

TAKE ME NOW.

***PS. This is the product of my boredom. Don’t freak and panic. I wouldn’t kill myself… Relax.

love, now and always,
Photobucket

The Last Hura...

July 06, 2009
What words made me let this feeling go...
"Ako yung masasaktan mo!"

And that made me realize how selfish I am.

I've been changing, improving and making myself head straight to the right life. Then, in one night I broke it all.

It's been awhile that I haven't smoke... probably more than 100 days.
It's been awhile that I haven't kissed someone or touch someone.

I was reserving me, my all to the "God Sent."
I am... trying so hard to be the good girl...

I started working a regular job and at the same time keeping the two rakets: 1 in gaming and 1 in Singapore. ... became a job freak.
I started saving money for the future.
It's the 1st time I Drove my car around Manila again, didn't use it for about two months now.... been renovating the QC house, got nowhere to park.

and now I'm back to scratch and zero.

Because I want to risk it all for this guy...
sad to find out that...
he is already risking it all for someone else.

Got my 1st and last date.... i dreamed for 5 yrs...
Got my 1st and last night... my 1st and last kiss...


Got and lost it.

byebye now ... i know this time i'll be able to let you go...
heart out.
love, now and always,
Photobucket

questions...

July 05, 2009
Mon(7/5/2009 7:15:22 PM): ai dyan ka pala ahahah
Jamie (7/5/2009 7:15:26 PM): ^_^
Jamie (7/5/2009 7:15:42 PM): SOL! don't fall in love
Jamie (7/5/2009 7:15:44 PM): love is cruel
Mon(7/5/2009 7:15:55 PM): waah
Jamie (7/5/2009 7:16:04 PM): emo ako the whole day
Mon(7/5/2009 7:16:10 PM): awww
Jamie (7/5/2009 7:16:18 PM): listening to this http://www.imeem.com/teamsykotikracing/music/fS-ctGWG/my-sassy-girl-i-believe-korean/
Jamie (7/5/2009 7:16:23 PM): looking at pictures...
Jamie (7/5/2009 7:16:47 PM): anyway
Jamie (7/5/2009 7:16:50 PM): kamusta na RO mo
Mon(7/5/2009 7:16:54 PM): uhh
Mon (7/5/2009 7:17:04 PM): yung dinownload ko ayaw magpatch ahahahahah
Jamie (7/5/2009 7:17:06 PM): (i'm trying to change the topic... but i'm still crying)
Mon (7/5/2009 7:17:10 PM): so yung cd nalang pagasa ko ahahah
Mon(7/5/2009 7:17:15 PM): nooo don't cry
Jamie (7/5/2009 7:17:22 PM): will give u load
Jamie (7/5/2009 7:17:31 PM): free! welcome back gift
Mon (7/5/2009 7:17:36 PM): yay
Jamie (7/5/2009 7:17:56 PM): if i attend work with chinita eyes
Jamie (7/5/2009 7:17:58 PM): don't laugh
Mon (7/5/2009 7:18:07 PM): yup
Jamie (7/5/2009 7:18:53 PM): ano ba download mo
Jamie (7/5/2009 7:18:58 PM): disk 1 2 and 3 dapat
Mon(7/5/2009 7:19:04 PM): yup
Mon(7/5/2009 7:19:07 PM): yun
Jamie (7/5/2009 7:19:13 PM): extract
Mon (7/5/2009 7:19:13 PM): ang tagaall ko dinownload ahahaha
Mon(7/5/2009 7:19:18 PM): nainstall ko
Jamie (7/5/2009 7:19:21 PM): kaso?
Mon (7/5/2009 7:19:22 PM): pero ayaw magpatch
Mon (7/5/2009 7:19:25 PM): nageerror
Mon(7/5/2009 7:19:27 PM): sa gitna
Jamie (7/5/2009 7:19:29 PM): patch mo
Jamie (7/5/2009 7:19:37 PM): sesend ko sau patch na yaw mag patch
Jamie (7/5/2009 7:19:40 PM): ang redundant
Mon (7/5/2009 7:19:55 PM): uh..?
Jamie (7/5/2009 7:21:12 PM): wala complicated
Mon(7/5/2009 7:21:18 PM): ahahaha
Jamie (7/5/2009 7:22:29 PM): sana kung malalaman ko ung missing patch sau
Jamie (7/5/2009 7:22:31 PM): masesend ko
Mon(7/5/2009 7:22:47 PM): ah
Mon (7/5/2009 7:22:52 PM): cge check ko
Jamie (7/5/2009 7:22:53 PM): kasi ganun din eh. kahit CD bgay ko sau wala din pag d nagpapatch
Mon (7/5/2009 7:23:00 PM): posible yun?
Mon (7/5/2009 7:23:08 PM): yung sesend ng patch?
Jamie (7/5/2009 7:23:29 PM): oo naman
Mon (7/5/2009 7:23:37 PM): wow naman
Mon (7/5/2009 7:23:47 PM): ngayon ko lang nalaman
Jamie (7/5/2009 7:24:46 PM): naman sol! bat ka ba nagpapatawa
Jamie (7/5/2009 7:24:48 PM): naiiyak ako
Mon (7/5/2009 7:24:52 PM): nageerror sa 2008-10-27Patchup_Ph file
Mon (7/5/2009 7:25:07 PM): waah
Jamie (7/5/2009 7:25:10 PM): anong episode po yan mr. mon
Mon (7/5/2009 7:25:14 PM): tawa ka nalang dyan
Mon (7/5/2009 7:25:32 PM): yung latest sa ragnarok.ph website
Mon (7/5/2009 7:25:34 PM): uh
Mon (7/5/2009 7:25:41 PM): demise of morroc i think
Jamie (7/5/2009 7:26:03 PM): walang ganyan saken wah
Mon(7/5/2009 7:26:29 PM): XVIII
Mon (7/5/2009 7:26:33 PM): episode
Jamie (7/5/2009 7:26:49 PM): kaya mo ba 2
Jamie (7/5/2009 7:26:58 PM): forever!
Jamie (7/5/2009 7:27:34 PM): papasok ka na bukas?
Mon (7/5/2009 7:27:43 PM): hopefully
Mon (7/5/2009 7:27:51 PM): may slight lagnat ako ngayon
Mon (7/5/2009 7:28:01 PM): 37.3
Jamie (7/5/2009 7:28:01 PM): ehhh pasok ka na po
Jamie (7/5/2009 7:28:09 PM): tapat mo daw mukha mo sa aircon
Mon (7/5/2009 7:28:15 PM):
Jamie (7/5/2009 7:28:19 PM): miss ka na namin
Jamie (7/5/2009 7:28:22 PM): wala ako makulit
Mon (7/5/2009 7:28:29 PM): cge cge
Jamie (7/5/2009 7:28:33 PM): yehey! ^_^
Jamie (7/5/2009 7:29:42 PM): A problem occurred while transferring the file "data.grf". The transfer has been stopped.
Mon (7/5/2009 7:29:57 PM): ahahaha ayaw talaga magpatch
Mon(7/5/2009 7:30:57 PM): dati naglalaro ako minsan may ganyan rin akong naeencounter
Jamie (7/5/2009 7:33:05 PM): pero ngaun dapat wala nang ganyan...
Mon (7/5/2009 7:33:28 PM): oh well
Mon (7/5/2009 7:33:41 PM): try ko maghanap ng solution
Jamie (7/5/2009 7:33:46 PM): will burn u the ragnarok folder nalang
Jamie (7/5/2009 7:33:47 PM): wahahahha
Mon (7/5/2009 7:34:54 PM): hahaha
Mon (7/5/2009 7:34:58 PM): laki nun
Jamie (7/5/2009 7:36:14 PM): kasya yan!
Mon (7/5/2009 7:36:42 PM): haha
Mon (7/5/2009 7:36:45 PM): yay thanks
Mon(7/5/2009 7:36:47 PM):
Jamie (7/5/2009 7:38:00 PM):
Mon(7/5/2009 7:38:36 PM): bakit ka ulit umiiyak... smile
Jamie (7/5/2009 7:38:49 PM): hmmmm
Jamie (7/5/2009 7:38:52 PM): nainlove ka na ba sol?
Mon (7/5/2009 7:39:05 PM): errr
Jamie (7/5/2009 7:39:07 PM): ung love mo ung isang tao tapos d ka love
Mon(7/5/2009 7:39:17 PM): :|
Jamie (7/5/2009 7:39:19 PM): bongga dba?
Jamie (7/5/2009 7:39:31 PM): what if u waited 5 yrs for nothing?
Jamie (7/5/2009 7:39:46 PM): would a day of tears heal that?
Jamie (7/5/2009 7:39:50 PM): no.

Mon (7/5/2009 7:39:55 PM):
Jamie (7/5/2009 7:40:01 PM): oh ikaw din iiyak ka na
Mon(7/5/2009 7:40:10 PM):
Mon(7/5/2009 7:40:12 PM):
Mon(7/5/2009 7:40:22 PM):
Jamie (7/5/2009 7:40:25 PM): bukas magdadala ko ng alak sa e-learning
Mon(7/5/2009 7:40:31 PM): ahahaha
Jamie (7/5/2009 7:40:32 PM): pero quiet ka lang
Jamie (7/5/2009 7:40:38 PM): papainomin ko kau nila sally
Jamie (7/5/2009 7:40:39 PM): wahahah
Mon (7/5/2009 7:40:45 PM):
Jamie (7/5/2009 7:41:15 PM): ahahah gin
Mon (7/5/2009 7:41:26 PM):
Jamie (7/5/2009 7:41:32 PM): sol kumain ka na?
Mon (7/5/2009 7:41:37 PM): di pa
Jamie (7/5/2009 7:41:46 PM): kain na!
Mon(7/5/2009 7:41:52 PM): la pa pagkain e ahah
Jamie (7/5/2009 7:41:57 PM): awts
Jamie (7/5/2009 7:42:01 PM): lika d2 lutuan qta
Mon (7/5/2009 7:42:09 PM):
Jamie (7/5/2009 7:42:10 PM): noodles! instant! wag choosy
Mon(7/5/2009 7:42:16 PM): hahahah
Jamie (7/5/2009 7:52:47 PM): kakain na dapat ako
Jamie (7/5/2009 7:52:51 PM): kaso nawalan me gana
Jamie (7/5/2009 7:52:52 PM):
Mon (7/5/2009 7:52:58 PM):
Mon (7/5/2009 7:53:04 PM): gutom ka na. kain na
Mon (7/5/2009 7:53:06 PM):
Mon (7/5/2009 7:58:14 PM): hayy nalampasan ko na yung problem... for now
Mon (7/5/2009 7:58:16 PM): grabe...ang arte, vista pala yung problem
Jamie (7/5/2009 7:58:23 PM): sa RO?
Mon (7/5/2009 7:58:27 PM): yup
Jamie (7/5/2009 7:58:29 PM): ekkk
Jamie (7/5/2009 7:58:36 PM): ano online ka na?
Mon (7/5/2009 7:58:39 PM): nung ri-nun ko as administrator yung RO, nagpatch na cya
Jamie (7/5/2009 7:58:44 PM): wahahah
Mon (7/5/2009 7:58:46 PM): wala pa akong load e ahahah
Mon(7/5/2009 7:59:07 PM): anong server mo?
Jamie (7/5/2009 7:59:16 PM): isang server nalang ngaun
Jamie (7/5/2009 7:59:18 PM): new chaos
Mon (7/5/2009 7:59:22 PM): ahahah ok
Jamie (7/5/2009 7:59:31 PM): e2 give qta load
Jamie (7/5/2009 7:59:33 PM):
Mon (7/5/2009 7:59:37 PM): yay!
Mon (7/5/2009 7:59:39 PM): aahahahhaa
Mon (7/5/2009 8:00:00 PM): dati hingi lang ako sa kanta ehehehe
Jamie (7/5/2009 8:00:34 PM): ay sol baka mashock ka! madami akong kaaway dun
Jamie (7/5/2009 8:00:35 PM): wahahaha
Mon (7/5/2009 8:00:44 PM): kaaway?
Jamie (7/5/2009 8:00:50 PM): ano char mo? chixi? wah! dati uso chixi eh
Jamie (7/5/2009 8:00:53 PM): kasi trashtalker ako
Jamie (7/5/2009 8:01:01 PM): >.< Jamie (7/5/2009 8:01:44 PM): http://gmtristan.com/make-ragnarok-work-with-vista/ Mon(7/5/2009 8:01:53 PM): hmm Mon(7/5/2009 8:02:03 PM): 2 characters last kong ginagamit Mon(7/5/2009 8:02:18 PM): 1 stalker 1 taekwon master Mon(7/5/2009 8:02:24 PM): kung tama memory ko Jamie (7/5/2009 8:02:33 PM): nice Jamie (7/5/2009 8:02:44 PM): 3rd job naman pala ung stalker Mon(7/5/2009 8:02:51 PM): haha Mon(7/5/2009 8:02:56 PM): dati masipag/addict ako Mon(7/5/2009 8:02:58 PM): Jamie (7/5/2009 8:03:07 PM): pvp? Mon(7/5/2009 8:03:13 PM): eheheh mahina lang Jamie (7/5/2009 8:03:21 PM): ano ragnachat? Mon(7/5/2009 8:03:22 PM): sa pvp summon ako ng summon dead branch Jamie (7/5/2009 8:03:23 PM): or plvl? Mon(7/5/2009 8:03:24 PM): Mon(7/5/2009 8:03:45 PM): err Mon(7/5/2009 8:04:21 PM): plvl? Mon(7/5/2009 8:04:42 PM): ai wait Jamie (7/5/2009 8:04:46 PM): huwai? Mon(7/5/2009 8:04:50 PM): ano na ulit plvl? ahahaha Jamie (7/5/2009 8:04:56 PM): palevel Mon(7/5/2009 8:05:00 PM): ahhh Mon(7/5/2009 8:05:05 PM): omg Mon(7/5/2009 8:05:14 PM): sobrang nakalimutan ko na ro Jamie (7/5/2009 8:05:19 PM): ahahaha Jamie (7/5/2009 8:05:27 PM): hala baka mag adik ka na naman >.< Mon (7/5/2009 8:05:38 PM): hahha Mon(7/5/2009 8:05:48 PM): bukas mawawala na isang addiction ko, kaya malamang Jamie (7/5/2009 8:06:01 PM): well Jamie (7/5/2009 8:06:08 PM): mabuti pa mag RO nalang Jamie (7/5/2009 8:06:11 PM): kesa naman ganto Mon(7/5/2009 8:07:00 PM): *pats* Jamie (7/5/2009 8:08:25 PM): sol laro tau Jamie (7/5/2009 8:08:26 PM): http://www.levelupgames.ph/hko/index.php Mon (7/5/2009 8:08:54 PM): hmm Mon (7/5/2009 8:08:57 PM): ano to? Jamie (7/5/2009 8:09:03 PM): hello kitty online Mon (7/5/2009 8:09:06 PM): hahahah Jamie (7/5/2009 8:09:07 PM): beta palang Jamie (7/5/2009 8:09:08 PM): Mon (7/5/2009 8:09:11 PM): cge Jamie (7/5/2009 8:09:13 PM): soon Mon (7/5/2009 8:09:14 PM): hahahahah Mon (7/5/2009 8:09:17 PM): ang cute naman Jamie (7/5/2009 8:09:19 PM): wahahaha! parang tanga lang tau dyan Mon (7/5/2009 8:09:31 PM): ano to? may labanan ba? Jamie (7/5/2009 8:09:35 PM): oo naman Jamie (7/5/2009 8:09:37 PM): may war din Mon (7/5/2009 8:09:42 PM): interesting ahaha Jamie (7/5/2009 8:09:43 PM): parang ragnarok Mon (7/5/2009 8:09:44 PM): pano kaya Mon (7/5/2009 8:09:46 PM): hahaha Jamie (7/5/2009 8:09:48 PM): kaso sila HK ang character Mon (7/5/2009 8:10:04 PM): pano kaya yun Mon (7/5/2009 8:10:06 PM): Mon (7/5/2009 8:10:22 PM): ah may registration and filtering pa pala Jamie (7/5/2009 8:10:53 PM): oo Mon(7/5/2009 8:11:55 PM): cge try ko ------------------- Nothing can heal that... give me my time to mourn, to grieve, to cry

love, now and always,
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judgment day

July 04, 2009

There will be people prettier than me, smarter, some stronger, better, perfect… but there won’t be anyone else loving you the way I do.

And if God had tested me all these years to truly weigh, how much I love you… Could today be the judgment day of all those years?
And if God had wanted me to wait for you, could it be that this day is the day to end my wait.
Break or make, do undo things. Go.
I will swim changes that will happen now, later cannot forgive.
And if not a shadow shows, this will be the time to give up.
And if not a strand falls, this will be the time to be bald.
And if not a heart beats, this will be mind.
Mind time. Think. Let go.



love, now and always,

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Birthday: No Beerday

July 02, 2009

Since my grandmother died last week, I was not able to celebrate my birthday. But I was able to have a simple dinner with my Vibalicous friends.

Personally, I would like to thank them for adopting me in their department. I really belong in the PR dept but residing in the E-learning Room.

I might not have the same dept. as theirs, not relate to most of their works, I'm a burden when I start moving around from time to time, and occasionally insanely-crazily laughing with no reason... But it feels like family with them!


They are all beautiful, brilliant, and bombastic people.

From Sol, to Mar, to King, to Sally, and to Sir Alfred.

Sol is the young-kidly-Chinese-OJT from DLSU. He's a code genius(or whatever you call it but he fixes our website). He's a picture freak..... and too talented for that. I wonder could it be that he doesn't "wanna be in the picture" that he takes the pics instead? Or could it be that I'm thinking too much now. I don't know much about this kid... but whoever his GF will be in the future is a lucky one. He's cute, chinito, tall(taller than me). Most importantly, he loves to eat. He takes everything. He's conyo but he eats isaw ^_^(haven't seen him, so no proof yet). I hope he doesn't leave us after his OJT. He is my chat/honey star buddy... Hope we always stay this way together!

Mar is the quiet one. What? I don't think so... Mar usually starts our conversation when I arrive at work early. He talks... talks way more than u think he do. He is gwapo. Yes, when I say gwapo, it’s the looks that’ll melt you(and not me). He’s a java genius (or is it JAVA?) He…. Ahm… he… what more? Think, type, Jamie. Well, he’s sweet, at some point, I think it’s sweet when he opens the aircon when I cannot reach it. He shares sentiments about life that you totally forget but struck your heart a message. I think he values family. I don’t know why I think of him that way… but I know he is a good boy, close to his family and focused and obedient to our superiors. He drinks beer.... he's human.

King... I'm used to call him without the word SIR even he is second in comand here. But when Sally came, I started calling him Sir... and I think he hates it. What do I know about him? Well, he is very kind to me. Whenever I ask a favor from him he immediately helps me. He loves her girlfriend so much. He don't use his seatbelts when driving... pwede pala yun.

Sally is my bestest friend in Vibal, my bff. I love her like my own sister. Before Sally came I was so sad with my life in Vibal, I would often have lunch with myself, talk to myself, do things by myself but when she came it's like I foundt my partner in crime. I'm thankful to God for her.

Sir Alfred, was of the great people I met in Vibal. He welcomed me and made me feel at home... Of all the bosses he is my most favorite one.

Thank you everyone for spending my birthday with me, for making me feel happy even just for a time.

love, now and always,

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